he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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