you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
