So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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