when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
