oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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