the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
they're like a gay fantastic four
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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