The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
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