Who did Billy Mays play for?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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