Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
