and you said cock pushups were impossible
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
