the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
