...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
that is very illegal...i love you.
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