Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
