Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
