Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize