and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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