we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
