yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
