Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
false alarm. still invincible.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
