Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize