Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
