I am spending my child support on dildos
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
