woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
