wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
