we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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