Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
