Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize