Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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