I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
50% drunk capacity currently
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
