I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Who died my cat blue again?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
