May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
