just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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