I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
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