how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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