I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize
