Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
