reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize