i just identified you from a description of your pipe
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
