Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
