What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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