yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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