Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
