i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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