I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
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