I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
