I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
accomplished twins. life is a go
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
