NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
