We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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