In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
