I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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