Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
