think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
