You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
so let's talk penis.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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