I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
